animation and stuff

9014

2012-02-03T13:18:00.003Z

besides that stupid fancy of being a lousy barmaid on the weekends, I actually work as an animator. I know, shocking.

(the last bit was her impression of me, not myself, really - I will be chained to my desk, and I'll enjoy every bit of it)

9001

2012-01-21T10:31:00.004Z

in the real life, the studio I work for is in the final week of delivery to Disney. in the unprofessional life, I'm occasionally behind the bar still.

I have better things to post...

2012-01-06T11:37:00.003Z

...but in the meantime, I don't have means to do it.

(sorry, it's a Holmes season right now, cause of "House of Silk" and recent theatre movie. And this strip is for holmes geeks)

white stuff break

2011-12-21T11:45:00.001Z

I just arrived at my parents' home for Chritmas. It's all white here. Holiday break time for a week.

The same story from alternative point of view:

2011-12-03T10:58:00.002Z

On Sunday, as I usually do on Sundays, I woke up around 2 in the afternoon, after having drinks till 5am with people I work with at the bar. Then, as usual, I found that I have very little in my fridge, and since Sunday's the only day off I get, I crawl out to do grocery shopping. Yes, this story is exciting. My hobby is baking, I bake up to three times a week, and at very least once, thus most of my shopping is somehow baking-related.

On the way to the shops, I passed by yet another busker on Rose St. They're always there, in one form or another. The guy wasn't anything special, but wasn't too bad either. That reminded me of THE busker, the guy who kept consequently turning my life into misery with his voice, past few months. The guys sounded a bit like him, in his first days. Back then we thought that was a busker, and he had a guitar. He lost it some time later, and his singing was becoming worse and worse. In past few months it become clear that the guy wasn't a busker, he was homeless. Since August till now I've been observing his degradation under my door. How much he annoyed me - you can see clearly from my previous entries. Police took him once, but he returned. Recently he was looking pretty bad - it became cold, he long lost his guitar, and didn't even sang that much anymore. One day, coming back from work, I've seen the police van in front of my door, coppers were taking him in. They were talking to him, and he just sat there, motionless, not reacting to anything. Eventually, they grabbed him into the van and I haven't seen him since. I believe I may, once christmas shopping starts, he may use this chance to get some money on busy Rose St again. But having that image in mind, and heaving another busker, it reminded me how much the guy changed this past few months.

When he first came under my windows, back when we took him for a busker, I was really annoyed at his bad singing. I really wished him to stop, and I couldn't understand why would someone keep singing so persistently, with so little talent. Now that I know he was homeless back then, I have second thoughts about it. Sitting on a busy street all day with thousands people passing you by, and hardly anyone noticing you, having nowhere to go, in a way - nearly not existing, the very little he could do to let the world know that he was there, was to sing.

Surprising amount of my shopping was organic, and after I got back, the man of the house commented on my story: "you're buying organic and you're having charitable thought, I don't recognise you anymore". Haha. That's what Sundays do to people. I'm far from charitable, just thought it was romantic. I guess that's my Christmas message done for this year.

8943

2011-11-24T19:34:00.002Z

the story of love, hate, life and death:

(I love when the title tells you a story. The day the Earth screamed)
he said, you cannot live in the ocean,
and she said to him, you never can live in the sky
and that's about love.
The hate is towards both the homeless guy outside my house, and city council of Edinburgh whom I payed the council tax YEAR IN ADVANCE and I would very much appreciate if they did something about the guy. He's been there as long as I can remember (yes, it's the same guy I've been complaining about earlier). And it's not about the fact that he's there, sleeps there, urinates there, and leaves lager cans outside my door. It's about his infamous singing. He either, hey jude, takes a sad song and makes it worse (much worse), or sometimes he starts rapping. Scottish fake African American accent, you just can't imagine what you're missing. I should add that I live on the top floor. Can't think of how horrible it must be for the ones below.

Life's rolling on. I'm cutting out little men and put them on sticks, and they pay me for it. Soon I'm to cut out little horses too. Not sure which way they'd go on the stick… hm…

I'm a bit sad. Recently, because of technical issues with my laptop - these are beyond my level of comprehension, and thus, control, which makes me feel quite helpless.

What makes me happier is mulled wine.
Death brings an end to it all.

PS. latest news - didn't get the funding. Oh well, I guess I have to get back to working for Disney - what a shame indeed ;)

8936

2011-11-19T11:21:00.002Z

(still haven't found anything to help me comprehend what the hell's going on)

8932

2011-11-13T15:12:00.003Z

been to London. Too busy down there. Not bad, but Edinburgh's much nicer. You can read about it HERE, to be honest, I haven't read it myself. I scrolled through it and there's a picture of me.

I'm generally confused about things happening around me these days.

8918

2011-10-30T17:49:00.005Z

too busy to update. Some stuff flying around festivals. And such.

and by the way, my alma mater loves me too:

amen.

8903

2011-10-15T11:22:00.004+01:00

I like things old-fashioned. I don't know what's so appealing about them.
I'm spending evenings watching films about and in a way, from the past. Like Jeremy Brett as Sherlock Holmes.

But I must admit, I prefer modern Jude Law as Watson. Funny detail I noticed watching the old series: Jude Law features in one of the episodes, as a servant/stable boy. In 20 year time he has made it into the Watson.

As for the preoccupying every day life, I'm still in gainful and sweet employment at film/animation studio, only that in past few weeks I've been moved from model-making into storyboarding and animating. It's generally great. Sometimes the routine of Monday-Friday job leaves me drained, as if would any "artist" (even a piss artist like myself). Sometimes, on the other hand, I remember all these years at school, being scolded for stupid doodling when there were far more important things to concentrate on: reptiles' digestive system, Shakespeare in algebra or organic chemistry. And, oh irony, what do I end up doing for living if not doodling? I should have been doodling more intensely, maybe I'd do better.

On all the other matters, Edinburgh's still as beautiful as it has always been, and the autumn surely is my favourite season. I have one unfortunate busker under my window, he appears there much too often, and the only thing to admire is his sheer persistence, to keep singing without any talent at all: surely not one person must have told him to shut up already. If you happen to know the busker guy (sometimes accompanied by some friend) singing on the corner of Rose and Castle St in Edinburgh, oh please tell him to shut up. On some occasions I have considered giving him money so he'd go away…

I'm combing unhealthy thoughts, drinking tea, or wine, baking some stuff and living meaninglessly, just the usual. My films are getting into various festivals, but I don't even have time to keep track of that, not to mention, to go and attend anything. I'll try to look into it. God bless busy live.

8889

2011-10-01T11:34:00.004+01:00

I was thinking of many things this week. Of Stalin's crimes, the crimes of my own, of being an artist, and its role in the society. Of how beautiful Edinburgh is every day as I see it going to work. Of the pointlessness of life (although on this subject I didn't get anywhere, as you can imagine).

Things are changing, I passed by Edinburgh College of Art: its orange got a bit paler with Edinburgh University signs. I am a busy, busy person, which is probably good. Only that I can't answer emails properly and on time.

During the weekends I'm still in the bar. It's not bad, only bad thing is that I didn't have a single day off in past two months yet, and it doesn't seem like I'm getting any till Christmas. But the bar is fun too, it's not a bad luck to be there, really.

8854

2011-08-27T12:37:00.001+01:00

I have lived without Internet in my flat for a month now. It is somehow detoxing. I realise how little I really need it, how well I can get around just checking my email once a week somewhere. I don't have time for this anyway: real busy working in the model-making team (or, officially, the art department) at Kolik. Sometimes it's tough, but we're making some really amazing stuff there, and you know: when I'm tired on the bus home, I think to myself - "how lucky I got myself tired making beautiful things". It's also a good team there; they kick me out if I stay and eagerly work too long (for now…). The talk is of pickled chicken, stations and stationery.

Artists, keep busy.

8848

2011-08-21T13:08:00.002+01:00

busy busy busy.

I got my first job in an animation studio. Model making on a top secret stop motion production :) So top secret, that even myself, I don't know what it's called.

nocturnal in August part 2

2011-08-13T12:49:00.002+01:00

Absolutely exhausted working till 6am in the bar way too often. It doesn't leave one much time for being depressed, so I need to catch up on this.

Check this out. They got the title wrong (I guess it's my fault for making too many films), but it's the thought that counts.

I also have just watched the last Harry Potter. I was delaying

it, because I don't like crowds, and even all the love for Alan Rickman's way of speaking without moving his upper lip couldn't make me get over the fear of ending up in a cinema full of loud teenagers. I love Snape so. Sketchy drawing I made before going to work last time:

From now on I'm going to be doing some model-making, which should make me busy like hell, but also pay my bills.

nocturnal in August

2011-08-07T12:45:00.002+01:00

the worst thing about my new flat is that just outside, 5 meters away, I can buy four cans of my favourite lager for £5.50. I can get it for £4.00 if I go a bit further (but that's a proper 20 minute walk). The second bad thing about my new flat is that it's so warm that I can't drink tea like I normally would, I have to have cold fizzy drinks. There comes the lager. Since I moved in my consumption of it grew around five times… The third bad thing about my new flat are seagulls, I only moved like 3 miles towards the seaside, and there's so many of them, so loud between 4-7 n the morning. But I've been told I would get used to that soon and I won't hear them at all.

All the other things about my new flat are good so far. I even found out how to turn

my letting agency's screw-up that led to me not having warm water (two weeks a counting now) to my advantage.

I'm doing some intense bar work at the moment (really intense, Edinburgh during the festival, oh yes my darlings, the world is unpleasant for those coming back from work after 6am, by the time I wake up and get ready, places are closing already), and soon I am to hopefully do some intense model-making work. I'm really looking forward to that, but it's a shush-shush-secret now (let's not jinx things). In case you didn't know (I didn't, it only came to my attention few weeks ago), I have become a stop-motion animator in this severe times of the recession. Haha.

my hair really grew quite a bit while I wasn't looking. The ones on my head.

8826

2011-07-30T16:58:00.003+01:00

I'm moving the flat. I'm planning to get internet in my new place some time, but then, when I spend like two days without it... you realise how much time I waste having internet now. I'll need that at some point: hell, I need it to work, but I'm not really in a hurry to get it yet.

I'm constantly sleepy. Bar work is soul and relationship-destructive for me recently.

8821

2011-07-25T22:51:00.003+01:00

silly things happen all the time. And that's not the only trouble Magners caused in our bar.

I'm moving the house. Mission, mission. All this stuff, makes one wish they could just pack all their belongings in one bag and walk away - but not, there's so much tying us down.

Good news, remember Cindy Derby and "Edward's House of String" me and my classmate worked on last autumn? It's gonna be part of the program for the 2011 New Original Works Festival at the REDCAT in Los Angeles this September. See the power of Edinburgh College of Art, you, America!

In the meantime, another little commission going on:

rave it is.

8814: bar doll

2011-07-18T18:34:00.002+01:00

I'm posting so much recently. Just cos I draw more. I used to draw a wee comic about a barmaid (based on my own experience of that wonderful job) in my third year in college. Now that I'm back in that bar, I may get back to drawing. Only that this time, I may as well publish it.

No, his question was actually rather boring and disappointing. No, it wasn't about where the toilets were, tho.

8810

2011-07-14T13:27:00.002+01:00

that's how it is. Another stop-motion commission to work on next week. I'm running here and there, not really fitting anywhere.

yes, life's funny. One can become a hypocrite stop motion animator just like that. Ok, I guess you need to be an animation graduate to get the "joke", and I can't afford to explain it now. It's rolling. I'm sleepy.

8808

2011-07-12T18:10:00.005+01:00

Back in the bar, flat and job hunting still. Freelance life - things get turned around from day to day. I can't tell the up from down. Or maybe it's that vodka. Oh yeah, did I mention I was back in the bar I used to work before? It's not bad.

a sketch of Cat Bruce, my classmate. I drew that like two months ago, but never got around to scan it.

here you can watch the video I was working on recently. Sorry for youtube quality. Considering it took me two days to make, I'm quite happy with it. Bright colours, everything happy and sparkling.

8800

2011-07-04T22:08:00.002+01:00

First about the project I did a while ago for Avital Ash: it's still not officially out (the opening titles will be available with the film), but here you can see a wee preview of work in progress:

Also, a stop motion animation advert (yes, I am a stop motion animator now. It came as as surprise to me as well) that should be out quite soon (this week probably), I'll post it here, but for now, here are some stills:

These dolls are really adorable. At first I was a bit like: that's a shift, I just finished a video about suicide (the Kaleidoscope), and I'm in the happy world of dolls, but playing with them was great. They're produced by local Edinburgh company.

Personal live: trying to get a flat. Oh my I want to get a flat... I hope it's not gonna be a nightmare - you know, cos many people are renting them just for the festival in August, and August is just when I need to move. The joy of living in Edinburgh.

8796

2011-06-30T19:26:00.003+01:00

I have graduated.

And then, there was some crazy tea party. More about that soon.

8783

2011-06-17T17:27:00.003+01:00

So here I am, a busy busy woman who'd rather just sleep thought the whole day, but the world keeps me awake. Graduation exhibition's almost over, graduation screening in the Filmhouse was a success, Donald Holwill's leaving party too. Now, when do we graduate? Some time soon, is it?

It has been some time ago that I have finished work on animated opening titles for the movie Kaleidoscope by Avital Ash. You can watch them with the film, wherever the film will be shown (next years Oscars, I suppose). Here's some more stills from the animation:

and thanks for feedback and general interest, this place also became busy these days,

love,

8764: news from the dark side

2011-05-29T20:22:00.006+01:00

graduation time. Need for cash, therefore, more nights in behind the bar: the job of my life, so it seems. It is fun, as the second best option, but then my hands are really dry after all the glasses to clean, and all the liquid that's always on my hands working there, then I need to put some cream or something, then that makes my hands oily, and then, then it leaves mess on the glass when I work on the rostrum.

Yep, there's some new project, don't ask me why. Not that long ago I thought I didn't want to animate ever again, and here I am, like a proper addict, there's no escape... The less I write about that project, the better, I think, for I've been working on it semi sober, and in a rather childish approach (my argument being: "because I want that this way, therefore it's right!"), I wonder if my director, Avital Ash, noticed (I wonder if she knows about this blog...). But, as far as I could concentrate, I figured out: it's animated opening titles for THE FILM. The Film is from far away LA. Cindy, didn't Cindy live in LA? I hope she'll like that, with every single rostrum project I'm taking paper cut outs to the whole different level. They'd be so 3D soon that it won't count as cut outs anymore... Am I making any sense in here?

Well anyway, forget my usual misanthropic complaining, and my allergy to fun, the credits are fun to do. I think I wouldn't mind doing some more of this kind of stuff in the future.

other extra lame news regarding my graduation from Edinburgh Gutter of Art: our class has a nice website. And our school designed much less nice website too. Night in the cinema, 13th of June.

And "an interrupted story" is in Anima Mundi.

I think that's all.

8755

2011-05-20T09:30:00.004+01:00

/wee something I'm working on while not working on anything. I know I shouldn't be doing charity work, but that project enchanted me/

I should be writing here more. Things are happening, lots of maybes and such, but nothing solid. Feeling ill, I may be getting out of the forest of Black spring. Still don't know what I'll do with myself next: looking for some jobs, I suppose.

Also, here's a trailer for what used to be called "the train project", and now it's officially "an interrupted story":

8734

2011-04-29T20:05:00.003+01:00

So the Britain is great, even ones like me get to wave the flag these jolly days. I've been out killing swans yesterday. I wasn't really. My friend was. But he didn't mean to, he has this addiction: he has to feed the birds, no matter how many times I tell him it's actually bad for them. I like singing "kill the birds" (to the melody of "feed the birds") on these occasions. But it was well nice, sitting in on the grass by that pond around Stockbridge having nothing to do, but in a delightful company. Nothing has really been sorted out, but things generally look better. I think I want to, I need to move on, if only to change scenery. To London, or to Glasgow: that is the question.

here's a showreel update, I think I made it around a month ago, but somehow never posted it online. I really need to think of publicity much more...

also, the degree show in the Filmhouse, where both of my degree films (I think, unless I change my mind, I wasn't sure about it first) will be screened is on the 13th of June. Check Filmhouse's website for ECA animation degree show.

8694

2011-03-20T14:42:00.004Z

That's a rather random watercolour of characters from my degree film number 2, one of these things I make when I don't want to animate, and try to avoid feeling guilty for not being productive. Another think of this sort is this wee film I put together, using supportive materials I gathered so far. I'm well bad with documenting the process of making this film, I don't even have a sketchbook.

I used some Sarah Keeling's footage, and some of my own silly things here. Bits of work in progress, bits of final scenes, and such.

8675

2011-03-01T22:02:00.009Z

happy Romanian Spring Day!
and how much do I know about Romanian Spring Day? Nothing at all, and yet, the arrogant me just got given the most wonderful martisor ever. Well, it was the first one I've seen in my life too, but it doesn't mean it's not amazing, cos it is. Check the pictures:

These are pressed dried flowers in resin, and there's a pin at the back so I can... actually, Oana, whom I got it from, she told me to stop showing off. Maybe she won't see this blog... Maybe...
well anyway, it's the most beautiful martisor ever!

And here's some boring pictures from the dark place where I dwell:

setting up a wee close up scene:

and you've gotta clean after yourself. twelve times a second:

I think that's all I wanted. Just to show off, really. Animation's going alright, dissertation's going alright. I looked at the map yesterday, thinking of where the hell will I be in July. Even London seemed so unbelievably far away. Scotland feels so cozy.

8667 /je ne suis que faiblesse et que fragilité

2011-02-20T22:59:00.009Z

I'm feeling a bit funny, so that's a random update today, unrelated to anything. I've got some nice stuff from the degree film to put on, but maybe some other time. Now it's the Sunday prayer time:

"Dear Mr God, please don't let me become freelance when I graduate. Or, if I have to, make it a successful one, so I don't need to go on begging for job everywhere, know people on facebook and chat to them as if I liked them.

Dear Mr God, you know very well that my dream job after I graduate is to be a housewife, and I meet most of the job requirements already. It would be great if you could keep in mind that my graduation is this July, and please send me a nice husband, someone working in some boring office so I could wash and iron his shirts, bake him cakes he'd have with his tea at work, and dinner when he gets back. I'm good at ironing too.

It would be nice if the house wasn't on the ground floor, I'm a bit scared of ground floors, they're too close to the world. But I don't mind, if there are wooden floors, or carpets, I can clean both.

Please make him so he doesn't mind my occasional mad fancies like going up on the roof or making some films.

Amen."

(maybe I should stop that marriage jokes, there's a danger of becoming a bit like Jonny Murray there...)

8656

2011-02-10T21:18:00.002Z

8652

2011-02-06T19:47:00.008Z

Good Sunday,

Probably lots had happened again but I was busy having lots happening to me so I couldn't write. What happened recently, so I still remember: Cindy Derby's "Edward's House of String". I mentioned that before, the performance me and Cat Bruce helped on, it was pretty awesome. So me and Cat had a good night.

Me, Pete Smith and Gareth Griffiths had also kind of finished the train film (that now has an official title, I should change the labels on the blog maybe some time...), kind of, it is, because we're still working on the sound. Anyway, I don't see it being screened anywhere before June (and I'm not even sure about June), so I'll keep it quiet for now, sorry. There should be a trailer available online within a month.

In the meantime, I had to start working on that degree film of mine (is there a deviation like that? A constant urge to make films?), here's some pictures, I don't have a camera of my own, so it's always a bit of a hassle to get any:

bits of the set

messy workplace of mine

part of the set again

from under the rostrum camera

As for more general, and far more important stuff, my oven broke, which is the greatest tragedy of all, and I can't get anyone who'd want to see "Tangled" with me, which makes me sad, well sad, I'm such a sad character.

PS. Oscars: Kind's Speech and How to Train Your Dragon. Because I say so, so it must be so.

8624

2011-01-09T21:48:00.005Z

going back to college tomorrow. no, please, no...
the train project/film is almost finished, there are like three scenes that need some work, I think. Should be animated this time next week, then it's sound, and credits, and rederings, and all that fun that I won't be able to enjoy that much: I need to start working on my degree film properly now.
Yes, I do ask myself sometimes, why the hell am I making so many films.
No, I don't know either.

I'm not sure if I should be putting any more stills from that project here, or just wait till it's all done. That's The Last Frame of the film. It's not the last frame drawn, there is still one scene I left myself as a dessert. It's the last frame chronologically.

More updates on another film coming here then. I started that blog for the degree film, but I don't feel like using it much. Lazy.

8608

2010-12-24T13:10:00.004Z

sorry for no updates recently, I'll be back in Edinburgh in January, hopefully full of enthusiasm to start working on my new, and what would seem the last film I'll make in Edinburgh College of Art.

This wasn't meant to be a finished drawing yet, but my photoshop went funny, so I stopped working on it. Not sure if anyone would remember (I hardly do), it's the main character of the film I made two years ago, on the second year. It was silly, but got nominated for few interesting things, it gave me more than I would expect it to. When I watch it now, I knew nothing about technical aspects, but I was animating more carefully, that "train" pencil tests are so rough I've got problems with reading them myself.

So that's merry christmas (although it's not politically correct), and good year 2011, for myself and my coursemates who are graduating this year especially. I wonder, where will I be next year this time?

8580

2010-11-26T20:02:00.004Z

dissertation. i need to say no more.

i don't need glasses. shame...

8575

2010-11-21T20:20:00.005Z

i'm not supposed to update here, I'm supposed to be working on my dissertation, I - very conveniently - left my notes in college. Oh Welles, what are we gonna do about this meeting this Thursday? :)

I think I'll make some mulled wine now.

Anyway, last week me and Cat finished these animation pieces we were doing for Cindy Derby's puppet performance, the preview's early December, I'm thinking I may go, but I this dissertation... the very thought is really killing me. Anyway, more details if anyone was interested: here.

∴ ∴ ∴

And here's a bad quality picture of my desk with the very last frame of the train film on the lightbox:

blue went grey, because he's a little upset:

8568

2010-11-14T19:01:00.004Z

The train, the train, the train. The film that has been keeping me busy for almost a year (I started thinking about it something around this time last year, and got first attempts to storyboards around Chritmas), finally there is some light there: I can see the end. I can at least see it, it's like being lost in the sea, where I can finally see some land, and no matter the distance, I can see it, so it's fine.

I'm happy I managed to stay positive and enthusiastic all that time, well, there's few more weeks of work, but it should be all fine.

I'll do some proper thanks later when it's over, but so far, thanks for the support and help, everyone.

Some stills from the film, pencil drawings I do and finished coloured images that are in the film, I like putting them together to compare:

8561

2010-11-07T20:13:00.009Z

I've started working on my degree film to be, still busy with the train project (almost there, almost there, maybe I'll post something about that in few weeks). After being all 2D and digital, I decided to try cut outs under the rostrum camera for that. Just so it's different, really, and because my studio in college is really freezing in the winter, so it's nice to hide in the darkroom (yes, these are the best reasons I can come up with to explain my choices about degree film. It is, if someone thought I take that degree seriously - I don't. Come one, I am studying a-ni-ma-tion. How can I be serious about it?). There is a separate blog for this production for the assessments purposes, but I haven't been updating it much.

Here's some pictures for stuff I've been trying for my degree-film-to-be:

(as you can see, there is smoking again, there is usually some smoking in my films, any problems with that?)

In the meantime, because working on two big films and dissertation (ok, I'm not doing the last one, but I should have, god, I should have...) is not enough, Cat Bruce and I got involved in another extra project: helping Cindy Derby on animations that are to be in her puppet performance. You can read more about that on her blog. Here's some pictures from that (not sure if I'm allowed to put them online or not, really, but I like them), animated by Cat Bruce so she did the real magic, but I designed the cut out puppet (oh what a complex design, isn't it?), did some lighting and camera stuff, so there's like 20% of my work there!

I think they look awesome. Well done Cat, she's doing some crazy magic.

So yep, that's how it's going. I find myself thinking of Poland again, can't wait to see Warsaw in December again (first thing I miss about Warsaw is its Chinese, and then my friend there. Ultimately, my friend out with me having Chinese...). But back on Earth: keep going girl, you really have to finish these films!

8549

2010-10-26T23:07:00.003+01:00

Bear Bone's new music video "Diving Bell" by Live Circus is out online.
I've been collaborating on that, doing the animation.

also, check the making of, I'm there animating some mice:

8525

2010-10-02T21:56:00.007+01:00

I've just put some "work in progress" material online: it's one of the scenes, from the animatic up to the final version stage. I like when people are sharing their pencil tests, and to compare them with the finished animation, so I hope it's interesting:

Also, I have started a separate blog for my degree film progress documentation. Yep, that's another film. There's not much there yet, but just to let you know: degreeetude.blogspot.com.

And, here's a drawing I did this evening, feeling down, so I though I should do something cheery and disneyish.

8518

2010-09-25T23:38:00.007+01:00

A long long time ago, during the first project we did in the second year, Alan Mason shared some of his legendary wisdom with me: "if you think that something is boring, it probably is". Now I find myself spicing up every little scene I work on, crazy camera movements or other insanities. It's his fault, if anyone wonders. All his fault. If not his support, who know what kind of crap films I'd be making now.

Few news:

My "train" film in intense work in progress, fell behind the schedule so badly that it may go on my big ego :)

It's all looking great, that's a positive, but taking well long. Well, that's probably what you get when you're making an 8 minutes long animation on your own.

In the meantime, I think I mentioned that before, I've been collaborating with Live Circus on new BearBones' video for their single "Diving Bell". It's been good fun, new experience, greenscreen and puppeteering mice. For an animator, it was great to get to go outside my dark closet, see real people. The premiere's planned some time in October, somewhere in the Emerald City of Glasgow.

Also, apparently-hopefully the film I made a year ago ("but it makes me happy") is gonna be screened as a short before two anime features as a part of "Scotland Loves Anime" festival (2nd weekend of October Glasgow Film Theatre and the 3rd weekend Edinburgh Filmhouse). Cool, ay?

Above all that, I have just started my final year at Edinburgh College of Art (eventually managed to get that far, yes, I can't believe it either), they've been bugging me with some dissertations and graduation films to make, or something of this ridiculous sort… such a drag to be honest, but I'll need to give it a thought some time soon.

So yeah, all sparkling and shining.

8488

2010-08-26T00:48:00.004+01:00

dying, but not dead yet,

on the road to El Dorado,

in love, but not fallen

keeping it balanced on this roller-coaster,

I'm fine, thank you.

8412

2010-06-11T13:38:00.006+01:00

First things first, someone twitted this article and I thought I may have a look, I'm to graduate next year this time, so it's good to know if there's some jobs going on, and… I found my own name there. Wow, how cool is that? I mean, someone bothered to SPELL the whole thing right!

Due to various reasons, even though I almost killed myself animating like crazy, I never managed to finish the TRAIN project for the planned deadline (that would be around now). It's 90% animated, and I'm working on the colouring now, the new plan is to finish it by September so I can concentrate on my graduation film and dissertation. Thanks for everyone who helped, and Claire, my main character number one fan - she says he reminds her of Gambit form X-men. I liked X-men, so I guess it's cool.

I really should update my website, or even make it serious (this article in the list, it made me think: "what if people really are looking at that website and it all looks like I'm a mental 14 years old?"). But I think the film is a priority right now, so the site won't change any soon. I can't even look at it myself anymore.

Right now I'm abroad where it's 34°C in shade right now. I colour my film, where the action takes place in winter, but it doesn't help. I'm to stay here just one and a half month more, so far my main place of residence is the cellar where it's a bit colder. But I share it with way too big spiders. Especially that they outnumber me greatly. And the Internet's only on the attic, where I think one could boil the kettle without putting it on.

oh flower of Scotland, when will I see your like again?

8376

2010-05-06T00:32:00.004+01:00

a wee line test i just did, my so called main character, or at least leading male, doing a little dance :)

well of course it's just not inbetweened properly and he's not gonna do it in the film, but i thought it looks funny.

I just discovered a big scene that I haven't done at all... it amazes me how one can miss a whole big scene in the film she knows by heart already...

8359

2010-04-19T21:09:00.005+01:00

scene 23, the conductor, line test i did today...with voices... makes me wonder why the hell was i lip synching it when in most of the frames her mouth is out of shot. and i actually drew her whole head... i'm becoming so pro, haha. not really. i'm way behind the schedule, that's sad, from good news: i'm finished with everything else at college so no distractions, and i'm going to see Gogol Bordello in Glasgow soon.

More good news, I'm hoping to recruit an extra animator for the film, my underclassmate Roza. we'll see soon.

There is more progress (or so I believe), but i don't have time to organise and edit it. I'm doing some hard core key frames like I never did before, that's me being organised. I may get some here later. If i have time.

8041

2010-04-01T01:25:00.005+01:00

a lot had happened. i'll probably skip some important at the time bits.

so, first Krakow, OFAFA - animation festival in Poland. it was so much fun, I have learned so much about Polish animation and I'll absolutely try to get there next year as well.

then BAFTAs in Glasgow - I did not win, but it was a valuable experience in a charming company.

I have the voices for the train project and i'm pressing on with animating. I was up north in Highlands recently visiting my friend - Cat, whom I sometimes make to animate for me as well. The time there only passes at something like 2 frames a second, but still looks so smooth.

Right now i'm in the process of switching from the pc to mac, i've been using both since i started uni, but now i'm biding farewell to pc. it's also a jump from CS2 to CS4, and it takes me a while to get used to. i only realised to what great extend i customised my old CS2 - it'll take me a while to get all the settings right. so there will be a bunch of odd frames in the sequence I'm colouring right now…

In the summer, I may get to work in my hometown's youth cultural centre teaching basic animation. that should be so much fun! But first I've got the film to finish. and the essay for Jonny Murray, due in 3 weeks, i'll start at some point next week…

there is some festival action going on as well, but my mind's not in it.

8313

2010-03-04T16:39:00.002Z

significant facts and numbers:
today, on the 8313th day of my life, Jonny Murray said "kind of" 298 times during his talk. one of his highest scores so far. the lecture itself wasn't that bad either.

"Monster in the toilet" got nominated for Bafta New Talent Scotland it's quite cool, isn't it? There's also four other people nominated from my department, so it's gonna be our big eca party!

Next week I am going to Poland for OFAFA (animation festival in Krakow), where two of my films are being shown, I also think that would be fun to look a little into Polish animation, which I know very little about.

listening to Julia Marcell, drinking Stella, which - I think - smells. I don't like it.

And there's also one thing I'd like to do, that I've always wanted to do: get on the rooftops and sit there, look at the Edinburgh city from up there.

In all that mess, I'm tring to get as much animation done as possible for the Train project.

8310

2010-03-01T19:25:00.008Z

lots of stuff happening around the production. I have found a sound designer (Pete Smith) and a composer (Gareth Griffiths), who so far showed to be really helpful, understanding, hard working, keen and... no, they are real people. or Ms Schizophrenia got me this time.

We did some vocals recording and I hope to have a proper animatic done soon.
It was a really exciting time for me, I need to learn to pretend to be a professional better. And I was depressed by my absolute lack of directing skills - something to work on in the future.
All my unprofessional crew of actors was doing quite well. with the exception of one couldn't help touching the mike... but that's what you get working with almost three years old.

In the meantime, I carry on animating and colouring. I wanted to share this test when I had the sun shining through the blinds, I love this effect :)

8297

2010-02-16T16:55:00.005Z

little things, like tea, conversations you're forced to listen to in public transportation, time you spend waiting for things to render, shoelances. you've got to tie them, untie them, and they make shoes with fake shoelances already, saves you trouble. but it's that little trouble that makes this time i spend here My Life.

here's some pencil tests me and Will Anderson did for the train project so far, plus one colour sample at the end (the quality here's crap, but in general i'm pleased). the plan is to have the whole thing in pencil done by the end of April, and then colouring - as soon as possible (which could be a while). next week we're hopefully recording the proper vocals so we can have the animatic fixed.

I have found a sound designer, and - hopefully - a composer to do the soundtrack.

PS. my tutors are still doing well entertaining me, that's a recent one: "As everyone knows,animation is a moribund art form which only a fool would want to study - and only a bigger fool would want to teach." Mason, A. (2010)

8292

2010-02-11T22:02:00.002Z

Seminar. During two hours, Jonny Murray said "kind of" at least 219 times. this is how many i managed to wrote down. and at least 30 minutes we were watching clips so he wasn't speaking. he can do much better, i believe. other than that, i made a drawing of Ben.

earl grey, with raspberry, stirred with a pencil. i was once told that girls who stire their tea with anything that wasn't designated for that particular purpose, they can never get married. and here i know why i will live and die in solitude. we all die alone anyway, an none of us can live alone either. so it's lots of bullshit.

i'm in a big need for
a) sound designer
b) recording studio
c) composer who would do the soundtrack.

i don't have time for anything, and i'm getting very little done, that could be frustrating if i had time to be frustrated.

but above all the every day hussle, i know that i am making an amazing film, and this feeling is wonderful.

8285

2010-02-04T20:26:00.001Z

Will Anderson's character design for the train project

i'll do something with my life, not only with my films. i hope it won't cost me a lung cancer. i'm a little unsure about the future, and i don't like it for one simple reason: i can't book advance tickets anywhere if i don't know which country i'll be in. and i don't like flying.

we started working on the train projects, the life in college got some meaning for me again. it's a bloody filmic image, and i want to make it. accidently, i found this idea for my gaduation film, which would be something totally different. so i want to do it even more. i'm working with many (more than one is many for us) people on that, it's challenging, overwhelming, yet exciting.

Cat Bruce's character design

oh, i wanted to put some pencil tests here, but blogger's gone bad, i can see. o welles...

8271

2010-01-20T23:50:00.000Z

we're doing this project at the college: we're supposed to make a short film every day for 10 days. it was the day 8th today, and i'm well tired with it. i'll hopefully have the train project's script done quite soon.

some of the films i made for that 10days project:

8260

2010-01-10T15:39:00.000Z

some pictures form my next, hopefully, film. the big plan is to have it finished by June. o yeah. i want to look more mature, this one's gonna be hard to counterfeit.

other than that - i've got some Orson Welles to watch. and some brandy to drink with Cat Bruce and Will Anderson. what more can one ask for?

8250

2009-12-31T13:20:00.001Z

snow in Warsaw

I've been travelling alot through Poland recently. now i'm back home in Edinburgh, which stays covered with snow. it's not even that cold, and looks beautiful. or maybe, nothing's cold after two weeks in Poland.

atheist christmas eve party we had in Warsaw

drinking amzazing coffee that my flatmate Georgi is so good at making, thinking of the summer. a while ago me and one of my friends had this idea of going for a trip around the world. as we obviously don't have that kind of money, we decided to start with Europe to get some experience. back then, his girlfriend was really against that madness so i think i kind of gave up on the idea, but now it changed and i got excited again. it would cost us both alot of money that any normal student should be saving up working during the summer, but we're only young once.

it's snowing alot again, my window overlooks the Meadows, it look great.

what i really should be doing, is the essay, and the animatic for my next film. i also have a lot of work behind the bar, as the festive season is rather busy. way too much work, so i drink coffee and walk the dog in the snow. i like it.

i've been nominated for RTS Student Award Scotland. i somehow hope i'm not gonna get it (i'm well bad with gettin awards, i always get extremely shy and probably seem like a dumb child), not yet, but i'm excited for the trip to Glasgow. the truth is, i have never been to Glasgow before.
happy hogmanay.

8217

2009-11-28T15:43:00.001Z

i don't remember being interested in storytelling at any point of my life. i wanted to be many things: the prime minister, a scientist, an antiques renovator, a teacher, a bartender. nothing to do with storytelling really. maybe because i've never could speak properly, in a literal and metaphorical sense.

i like walking with my eyes closed. i like listening to things, and feeling them. i do feel a little bit uncomfortable, sometimes, lost in the darkness. i'm not as worried about hitting something or falling over, as i am about other people. i'm scared of getting too close to someone accidentally.

i try to work on my next film, but Uni work, part time job and the lack of motivation in general get in my way alot. that's something to be changed.

i haven't mentioned, i got into 6th London Short Film Festival (8th – 17th January 2010, mine's on the 13th), as part of the "Trick of Light" screening. cool.

8210

2009-11-21T14:33:00.000Z

living in the world where there's no right or wrong, how can we be asked to take that responsibility and draw the line to define these? and yet, we are.
in the big Anything-Goes world, we're being asked to have an idea of the future. there's nothing to fight for, nothing to rebel against, nothing to embrace or neglect, nothing that would make any voice of opinion valuable.
and you asked us to make up some rules. again.
i find this uncomfortable.

after experiencing life as a human for a while, in which i failed miserably, i decided to go back to being a film making machine. it's quite a sad thing to do, if you think about it, but i try my best not to think about it, so it's fine.

here's s wee test for my next (hopefully) film (project working title: train). i really want to make a film in this kind of style, but i'm not sure if it's really gonna work. esp. that the story is quite long.

ps. i liked "the men who stare at goats". i actually liked a film. that's strange. more about films coming soon, as the year's coming to an end and the oscars are approaching.

8205

2009-11-16T18:59:00.000Z

the Red Eminence told me the secret to life. it's pretty much like the secret of the Soylent Green.
i happened to confirm that i was a monster. film making, blue eyed monster.
it's pretty bad, if you think of it.
it's not that bad, if you don't think of it. thinking of stuff makes you go mental, they should have combs that you can comb the things IN your head, as well as on the surface.
i haven't been to the cinema for more than a week now. i'm beign to feel anxious. that is an illness of some sort.

i should be doing the only thing i can be doing: films. i should. i can never be forgiven if i try to do anyhing else.

this Wednesday my film's being screened at Manchester Exposures. cool. i was supposed to go, but i couldn't in the end.

- my colouring of Will Anderson's drawing, since he's scared of colour.

8190

2009-11-01T22:06:00.001Z

it all started to feel as if it was playing too fast. "i don't like your pacing", i thought to my life.
all the wonders and amusements i had during this way too long weekend, including seeing people having sex on the bus stop, one couple kissing, that looked alot like that shot from 'spiderman', only that the guy wasn't upside down, then one man pissing, but completely naked, and some more strange people. then the rain was getting heavier and heavier and i drunk too much. i mean, not that much, but i was supposed to work on the storyboard, and i'm not able.
then again i had some guy giving me his number. again - it doesn't happen every day, but often enough for me, who doesn't do that at all.
i don't really get it, if i were to have a relationship it would so not start with exchanging phone numbers. i am a helpless romantic. i would never go out with someone just for his look (or wouldn't respect a guy who does for her look).
i mean, if you just want to get laid, there's so many more drunk women in the bar, you don't go for a barmaid who obviously won't be able to go with you that night cos she's working.
and if you're after something more than simply sex, then it's well shallow to do it that way.

if i were interested in someone, i would talk to them. i would talk to them again, i would look for a chance to talk, i would want to find out so many things about them and tell them about me before i'd even think of giving them my number and suggesting "i've got a double bed and it feels empty there".
i probably am a helpless romantic and can't find my way in the modern world.
that's how i never really look at this numbers i get.

in general, it wasn't the best weekend i ever had...

8188

2009-10-30T21:39:00.001Z

'the present is only intelligible in the light of the past'

'pin the pegbar on the animator' - postmodern collage: A. Mason & D. Holwill by N. Gibson, 2009. 'so playful'

Donald Holwill - the wizard, the head of the animation department at Edinburgh College of Art. the head of animation. on the second year we developed the theory that he really is a ghost, the great puppet master behind the shell of a body we encounter in animation department. and he shall be there immortal.

Donald Holwill is definitely a wizard, i am attending a school tutored by real wizards! i mean, i always knew eca animation was special, but i wouldn't expect that (i wouldn't expect it cos i would never think of it. and that's my arrogance at its best).
i may tell you why at some point, but not just yet. and i'm not sure if the great wizard himself would like it if i did.

these are few of many reasons why animation at eca is the best place to be.
(the main reason is obviously - because i am attending there)

this post may not make much sense.

8182 on the way to the station Nowhere we encounter funny places.

2009-10-24T15:19:00.000+01:00

i am a bad, bad barmaid. what i wrote some time ago about the licencing law getting more and more strict, and all the discouraging from drinking idea... i feel a bit like a devil watching my customers through the night, how someone comes for just one pint early on, and ends up barely walking at 4 am.
i've been unfortunate enough to see some bad films recently. or - so to say - highly acclaimed shite.
probably the best of the worst was hertzfeldt's 'meaning of life'.
i used to hate his films, i refuse to remember his name (i copied and pasted it from wiki up there) - i feel like i'm absolutely from different planet there, because i don't find his films funny at all. i find them stupid and vexatious, like when in a train or something you have to listen to some culturally retarded teenagers' conversation.
but i was made watch all of his dvd in college. that was a disturbing experience. i found myself in the room full of people laughing at something that was making me feel sick. it was an interesting thing indeed - made me think of how awful human nature is and how much i don't belong there. intentionally or not, i've learned something valuable from his films.
ay, about 'the meaning of life' - that actually was funny, because this film, as i thought, wasn't meant to be a comedy, yet people were still laughing. the audience is a vicious thing, indeed.

god, i've got some hard character design (i properly suck at that) and a story board to do, then - i'm quite busy at the bar as well, and i'm so sleepy. and the project at uni to do as well, it's not bad, but it seems like that would take quite alot of my time. and so much is happening on the computer, i don't like working on the computer that much.(drawin by Cat Bruce, coloured by me again, i like our collabs)

8168

2009-10-10T16:54:00.000+01:00

i don't have the thing for any new film recently. looking through many stories, some of them may be good if i give them more thought, but it just doesn't grasp me. sometimes i get a little kick for a day of two, but it doesn't last long. and it needs to last hell long for an animator.

there is one story i originally thought of as live action, but i think it may be interesing in animation as well. kind of 'romance', but without love really. interesing? i may talk it through with Bruce (meaning: i would talk and talk and she would drink tea or irn bru not necessarily listening, but simply talkin would make me realise what works and what doesn't. i can do it without Bruce really, but it makes me feel more insane to talk clearly to myself. i need her around as an excuse).
then, i wanted to so stop motion for a while, but it doesn't feel like stop motion at all.

my computer's falling apart as well. that sucks.

the film i'm working on right now, it's more of some experimental play than a film really. and i find myself well random when the big question (delivered by the devil himself - Alan Mason) arrives: "WHY?".
why - behind every little choice i make.
in this particular project i would say - "why not?".
that seems to be an answer for a while.
it isn't really.
it's more of an excuse.
i may try to use it for time being, simply because i seem unable to find any answers recently. but i won't give up.

8162

2009-10-04T16:50:00.000+01:00

my pc crashed again and i started browsing apple online store (one day, one day...).
current project can't get me excited at all.
and i don't give a shit about professor Mason saying that it's the student that makes the project exciting. embracing everything as it comes and giving it all - that feels like mental whoring for me. life's too short and if i were to give it all to every single project, it'd be even shorter. i enjoy sleeping and wasting it as well.

high on cream soda (another thing Bruce got me into), and i think i've got a cold. i find it so much easier to work directly on the computer, but then it becomes pointless to go to college. i like going there for social reasons. so i end up going, wasting all that time and not having any work done.
autumn looks pretty in Edinburgh. i even went quite ok with money. at least till the end of this month. another thing i became so British at: feeling so mighty after Friday when i get my wages.

maybe that's how it should be: crashing, your computer gives you an excuse to drink another coffee and write something on your blog.

8151: uni started again.

2009-09-23T22:41:00.000+01:00

i was as negative as i can, you can always count on me when it comes to that. it actually made me feel sick. all that enthusiasm, many loud people, new, "exciting" projects, all overflowing with happiness. i'm probably alergic to happiness.
and the banner project: i want to be a film maker, not a banner maker. shit happens, i have to do it.
i've been thinking of animation schools recently. you know, many people complain about Edinbrurgh College of Art, that nobody really teaches us anything etc. isn't that life, that you only get what you reach out for? that there's nothing really given?
there probably are schools that produce amazing, tiny cogs to fit into the animation studio machine. people who study all these tricks to make an animation look more real than live action. people who absolutely succeed in that. people who don't seem to have anything to say.
when i'm watching their work, it looks so much more mature than our silly things. and i can't see a single personality showing in these. just the massive monster of the industy conventions.
i'd rather wish to see animation "reach into places where live action doesn't go", really.
in the end i don't mind not being that skilled in portraying motion, because that's not what animation's about. whatever it is about, i can't be sure. but it's just what i make it, and i make it much deeper.
i'm happy to be attending ECA, where animation dep looks pretty much like the Toon Town from Rogger Rabbit. no matter how much i feel sick there sometimes, with all my alergic to happiness, there isn't any better place to be.

"why do people want to fly?"
"because they can't?", Bruce answered.

8137

2009-09-09T23:52:00.000+01:00

i was thinking alot, what the hell is love. i heard many people talking about it, so i though it must be something important. sadly, i couldn't think of anyone who would know what love is. i texted Bruce, i though that from all the people, she would know.
she answered:
"a type of fruit u can buy only in ALDI... only in ALDI..."
clown.
i sometimes think i would like to be human, and they seem to be about love, so i wanted to know.
i don't think it would be an easy one.

what is love?
i am seriously looking for any answers because i have no idea. simply no idea.

8135

2009-09-07T10:21:00.000+01:00

end of festival season. edinburgh international festival fireworks:

like that, and many other, for an hour yesterday night. feels like Walt Disney movie.
recorded with one of the crappies cameras ever.
note to Santa Claus: i want a new camera. i just remembered that the one i'm using isn't even mine...

8130

2009-09-02T15:08:00.001+01:00

i found a watch, quite a nice one. nice enough for me to keep it. i like how its face has similar design to all these scary clocks in the old part of London. and it has one wee window with day of the month in it, that's god damn useful for someone like me (September really surprised me this year, i was sure i had at least 10 days of August left when it was the 1st already).
i fixed it.
but i can't wear it. it just feels wrong, as if my hand were cursed by some "time-measurin" monster.
it is beautiful, but scary at the same time.
fixing it, when i think of it now, it was kinda like giving the life to something that shouldn't be alive.
isn't that the filthy job of an animator?

1st of September was also changes in drinking policies in Scotland. it is really, really bad. as if drinking weren't so expensive already, you've gotta ID everyone under 25 (bloody 25), now you can't have deals on alcohol (no 'happy hours' in pubs then, no buy 1 get 1 free in TESCO... that makes me sad... we're only having 'sad hours' now). but you know what pissed me off most? that me, as a bartender, in the holy name of "discouraging from drinking" can't suggest "the same" drink to the customer. i can't ask: "same?" and serve the drink the customer was drinking here for years, because that encourages drinking. honestly, that's how we make tips. and that's the pub culture. o my god, this world's going nuts.

well, let's make the legal drinking age 25 then, and double the prices, oh yeah, because that's gonna fix everything.

8127

2009-08-30T12:28:00.000+01:00

i've got way too much work. at work. and at home with animation.
"someday were both gonna die, our bodies will rot and maggots will live in us, so lets be happy" (Robert Benfer, he's no authority, i just liked this silly song)

8112

2009-08-15T19:00:00.002+01:00

yesterday (today morning, actually), something past 6am, i met one drunk woman. she wasn't even that bad. she started walking next to me, telling me how she gad that argument with her father, i got to know her whole family story (quite a complicated one), her tattoos and god knows what else i was fine without knowing.
first, when she started, i let her talk, i though - if she needed that, i can half listen on my way home. but then i got pissed off. was i a green fairy again?
you know, that happens, you get to listen to whatever the drunken men at your bar have to say. green fairy - some mysterious creature keeping the alcoholic's company, listening to his stories.
i'm not a fairy.
i'm not a piece of furniture one'd talk to.
i don't feel like carng for anyone's dramas. i can only make films based on some more interesting ones.

it pissed me off, because - like most of them - she never cared about me. never cared if i wanted to listen or not, what was i doing there at 6 am. never cared if i even existed, treated me like a thing, a simple thing to talk to. i don't feel like listening to such people's dramas.
if i were a green fairy, i would eat them afterwards.

8109

2009-08-12T23:14:00.001+01:00

i only got this blog so i can comment on other people.